Out of all of the quotes and writings I’ve ever read on forgiveness, this one says it best.” FORGIVENESS is not something we do for OTHER PEOPLE we do it for OURSELVES…to GET WELL and MOVE ON.”

The big lie you and I bought into about forgiveness is that we do it for the other person. To date, we have not been able to experience the feelings of another person. If one is holding onto an issue that they have not forgiven another person for, they are the only one that gets to feel the feelings of un-forgiveness. As we grew up, we’ve been sold the bill of goods that to forgive is divine. I say that understanding what you now know, to not forgive is kind of silly because you’re the only one paying for it.

It has been my experience that it is easier to forgive someone else than it is to forgive yourself. A possible reason might be that you can forgive someone else and walk away and forget about it, but you are stuck with yourself forever! The thing that you want to forgive is always there with you, part of you and not as easy to walk away from.

So, how do you forgive yourself? One way is to take the point of view that not forgiving yourself is like holding a hammer in your hand and continually whacking yourself on the head, while simultaneously blaming yourself for whatever you did, and that “blaming of yourself” provides the justification to continue whacking. Once you realize you’re the one holding the hammer, you can simply put it down and heal.

In life things happen and the only way to get well is to forgive (even ourselves) have a cup-o-joe and move on.

cupojoe_blog

By-the-way! I am of the belief that nothing I write is true. My writings are nothing more than the rantings of a pseudo eclectic and are therefore only “my point of view” to be tried on or not, with no more thought than you would try on a coat for functionality in your life.